Thorns FC: Cold Open

As the final regular season match of 2019 it was an epic letdown on the scale of the last episode of Game of Thrones. As entrance to the playoffs it was stone-cold . But y’know what? I really don’t want to go in depth over the dreary scoreless draw the Thorns played out against Washington […]

Hammered Rivets: 2019 Wrap-up

The Thorns closed out the regular season in front of a near-sellout crowd at Providence Park. The match itself was frustrating, but there were plenty of other goings-on to entertain us. Before the match started, the Orlando-Reign match was showing on the big video screen. When Marta scored the equalizer at the death, there was […]

Episode 30: Out of Sinc

The end of the season kind of feels like we all took an elbow to the nose. Join us as we talk about Vlatkoball, the potential end of Christine Sinclair’s career (T_T) and Nadine Angerer: Ice dancer? Plus Richard with the attendance report and your questions. Available wherever you get your podcasts! And in case […]

Thorns FC: Swept Away

When I think of “trouble” this season my first thought is usually “The Damned”. But you know who has really been the hammer on the Thorns this season? Tacoma. They’ve utterly stoned us; 0-3-0, outscored 4 goals to nil, swept the season series (and 2-5-0 over the past two seasons; the two wins were, fortunately, […]

Thorns FC: It’s Complicated

The good news is that it was a win after two dispiriting losses, and it was three points at a time when the Thorns desperately needed points to stay in the playoff hunt. The bad news? Well, it’s complicated. First let’s talk about what came in with the two teams last Saturday. Portland…were scrabbling desperately […]

Episode 29: To Boo or Not to Boo

We talk about the behavior of racist fans, booing during the swearing-in of new cadets, what Buy Your Capo a Pint actually means, and even a little soccer while we’re at it. As mentioned in the episode, if you’d like to donate to Buy Your Capo a Pint and won’t be at the game (or […]

Thorns FC: Not Good At All

Chris Henderson summed up last Wednesday on his Twitter feed perfectly: It wasn’t just power. It was power propelled by speed. Here’s just one example, beginning in the 27th minute, although keep in mind the Damned Courage are already up three goals to nil at this point. Crystal Dunn overruns Christine Sinclair, strips her of […]

Thorns FC: Good but not good enough

On paper or pixels it looks like it should have been a quick, one-sided, brutal beatdown. The Portland Thorns went to Salt Lake City and outshot the Utah Royals 21-7, and put 6 on frame to Utah’s 3. They won 11 corners to Utah’s 5. Dagny Brynjarsdottir rattled a bullet of a header off the […]

Episode 28: Good But Not Crucial

A lot has happened since the last episode, so we’ve got a bonus sized edition for ya! Five matches to briefly talk about (especially that cray cray one against the Courage), Rose Lavelle and concussion protocols,Richard on league attendance and we weigh in on the whole Iron Front stuff, plus Merritt complaining that nobody appreciates […]

Thorns FC: Merciless

There’s a saying that I think is probably as old as Sumer. It goes like this: “When your enemy is drowning, throw them an anvil.” Or whatever they used for anvils in Sumer. C’mon. You get the idea. Last Sunday the Chicago Red Stars came to Portland trailing smoke after two ugly losses to the […]