Nothing to Get Too Excited About

(in which the Thorns handily win a friendly and get an unlikely next opponent) The Thorns hosted the Chicago Red Stars on Saturday for the season finale. The game was decidedly tilted in Portland’s favor even more than the 3-1 score indicated. But since Chicago wasn’t really trying, the win has a somewhat hollow feel. […]

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Meets Minimum Standards

(In which the Thorns are held in check, but return the favor. Postseason looms) The Thorns made the long trip to Florida and came home with a point and a record-breaking clean sheet. With the home semi-final locked up, the objectives for this match were different than normal. Primary objectives: get the defense back in […]

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Entering the Home Stretch

(in which we have a brief recap of the Thorns’ glorious successes to start September) Since my match report is late, I decided to try a different format this time. Borrowing from others, here are my highlights by the numbers in no particular order. 2 – Crucial wins against the soft part of the remaining […]

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Emerald City Gem

(In which the Thorns beat the Reign 2-1 and break the Curse of Memorial Stadium) Take a base element, in nature or the lab, and apply constant increasing heat and pressure for a long time. The result can be a perfect gem. On Saturday, the Thorns produced a beautiful red ruby in only 90 minutes […]

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Six of Nine: Mega Match Report

The Thorns played three games in a week and garnered six valuable points. But they also dropped three points you’d reasonably expect them to get. At the Chicago Red Stars The first match was at Toyota Park in Bridgeview, Illinois. The Red Stars were in second place in the standings with the Thorns one point […]

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Earlybird Special

(In which the Thorns give a clinic in midfield play and two noobs find the net) Portland hosted the Houston Dash for a brunch affair and came out on top 2-1. Aside from a few brief moments, the Thorns dominated the match. By the fiftieth minute the Dash looked they could not wait to be […]

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(in which the Thorns play half a game but still get an entire result) Portland hosted the last-place Washington Spirit in the second match of a three game homestand. The Thorns came from behind to win 2-1. The result left the Spirit in the league’s last spot but Portland moved up to third. As has […]

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Turning Point?

(in which the Thorns pull off a huge win against long odds) The Thorns hosted the league-leading North Carolina Courage on Saturday in a rematch of last year’s semi-final playoff match. On the back of an outstanding defensive effort and a Hayley Raso headed goal, they won 1-0. The win moved the team back into […]

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Episode 16: An Outside Perspective

Gwyneth Defriez and Dakota Todd join Patrick this week to talk a little bit about the Dash vs Thorns match, Carli Lloyd’s unwillingness to understand what constitutes a red card as well as a conversation about why She Who Will Not Be Named never quite fit in with Portland fans. Both Gwyn and Dakota are […]

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