(in which the Thorns win the NWSL Championship and Portland pees itself a little) The NWSL Final was played in the land of sanitized fairytales. The original stories included dark themes of villainy, maimings, and worse. But then a hero emerged and everything wrapped up with a happy ending. How appropriate for this match. The […]Read More Fairytale Come True
(in which the Thorns dispatch the Pride at home and now are going to the Final in Orlando) The Thorns beat the Orlando Pride 4-1 at Providence Park to earn a berth in the NWSL Final. One more win, this time versus the North Carolina Courage, and the Thorns will be the league’s second team […]Read More Bye Orlando! Oh, Hi Orlando!
(in which the Thorns handily win a friendly and get an unlikely next opponent) The Thorns hosted the Chicago Red Stars on Saturday for the season finale. The game was decidedly tilted in Portland’s favor even more than the 3-1 score indicated. But since Chicago wasn’t really trying, the win has a somewhat hollow feel. […]Read More Nothing to Get Too Excited About
(In which the Thorns are held in check, but return the favor. Postseason looms) The Thorns made the long trip to Florida and came home with a point and a record-breaking clean sheet. With the home semi-final locked up, the objectives for this match were different than normal. Primary objectives: get the defense back in […]Read More Meets Minimum Standards
(in which we have a brief recap of the Thorns’ glorious successes to start September) Since my match report is late, I decided to try a different format this time. Borrowing from others, here are my highlights by the numbers in no particular order. 2 – Crucial wins against the soft part of the remaining […]Read More Entering the Home Stretch
(In which the Thorns beat the Reign 2-1 and break the Curse of Memorial Stadium) Take a base element, in nature or the lab, and apply constant increasing heat and pressure for a long time. The result can be a perfect gem. On Saturday, the Thorns produced a beautiful red ruby in only 90 minutes […]Read More Emerald City Gem
The Thorns played three games in a week and garnered six valuable points. But they also dropped three points you’d reasonably expect them to get. At the Chicago Red Stars The first match was at Toyota Park in Bridgeview, Illinois. The Red Stars were in second place in the standings with the Thorns one point […]Read More Six of Nine: Mega Match Report
(In which the Thorns give a clinic in midfield play and two noobs find the net) Portland hosted the Houston Dash for a brunch affair and came out on top 2-1. Aside from a few brief moments, the Thorns dominated the match. By the fiftieth minute the Dash looked they could not wait to be […]Read More Earlybird Special
(in which the Thorns play half a game but still get an entire result) Portland hosted the last-place Washington Spirit in the second match of a three game homestand. The Thorns came from behind to win 2-1. The result left the Spirit in the league’s last spot but Portland moved up to third. As has […]Read More Unconvincing
(in which the Thorns pull off a huge win against long odds) The Thorns hosted the league-leading North Carolina Courage on Saturday in a rematch of last year’s semi-final playoff match. On the back of an outstanding defensive effort and a Hayley Raso headed goal, they won 1-0. The win moved the team back into […]Read More Turning Point?